Haters gonna hate…I’ve never really given much credit to this saying. Whenever I’ve heard it, I’ve imagined some orange, tracksuit wearing bint, sucking on a Richmond Superking, decked in pages 1-99 of the Argos jewellery catalogue*, using that declarative statement as a way to avoid taking responsibility for her shitty behaviour.
However…after following well-known celebrity Khloe Kardashian’s Facebook page for some time, I can honestly say that now, whenever I check in to see what she’s up to, ‘Hater’s gonna Hate’ is the first thing that pops into my mind.
She receives every insult from ‘Don’t talk about your dad, we all know it’s OJ’ to ‘You didn’t get that body from working out, you got it from surgery’. From an outsider perspective these comments seem to spring from feelings of anger, jealousy, resentment and hate. Why else would you put so much effort into verbally bashing a young woman that you’ve never even met?
Khloe’s origins are a matter for her and her family, and not something that I would ever spend any time thinking about. And after reading her book ‘Strong Looks Better Naked’ the only emotion I feel is empathy for her tragic loss at such a young and influential age.
However, her AMAZING transformation in terms of her body, is something that she has put out there for all to see, and something that I could talk about all day. In every new picture she posts she looks not only leaner, but stronger, physically and mentally. And I think the most beautiful part of it for me is, that she didn’t always look that way.
Anyone who knows me well will know, and for those of you who don’t, I am OBSESSED with Kate Hudson. To me she is the epitome of a successful, beautiful woman. But being Kate’s number 1 fan is sometimes a bitter sweet position to be in. There has never been a picture of Kate Hudson looking fat. There’s been pictures of her looking tired, angry, pale and skinny, but even when she was pregnant she still managed to look better than any woman I know, AND lose the baby weight in record time. So sometimes looking up to her as an ‘ideal’ or as inspiration to get up an hour earlier for the gym, proves to be counter-productive, because I could spend the rest of my life working out, and I will still never even come close to achieving my body goals, or rather, Kate’s body goals.
But with Khloe, it’s different. She was regularly labelled, rightly or wrongly, the ‘Fat Kardashian’. To me, she was the ‘slightly chubby, more ‘real’ looking one,’ but my opinion doesn’t matter to the media rats, salivating, waiting, for a bad picture of her to slam on the front page of a trashy magazine, with the label FAT. And it is this that makes her journey from the ‘fattest’ to the fittest Kardashian, all the more fascinating. Anyone who has ever tried to get in shape will know how hard it is to not only make the first step, but to keep stepping up, again and again, after that. I personally must have had gym membership for every gym that’s ever opened in the City; thinking that each one would hold some sort of magic inside of it, to keep me going, to keep me motivated, to finally make me a size 10. I know what it feels like to be labelled the ‘Fat One’. Regularly surrounded by what feels like a sea of Size 8 friends, I have always felt like the Black Moor in a tank full of Neons. The struggle with fat is a real. The journey to slim/healthy/lean/strong, is a long, and sometimes lonely one. And ‘our girl’ Khloe has fought her way there and smashed through the obstacles in her path like a bear, crossing the finish line like a gazelle. Inciting the mindset of ‘if Khloe can do it, so can I!’
Anyway, enough with the animal references, you get my drift. My question today is, why have haters gotta hate, and how do we tune out the noise when they do?
For me, the answer is simple, the people who make these nasty, bitter comments, do so because they will never have what it takes to commit to getting a body like hers. They choose to eat the french fries instead of the salad, hating instead of HIIT, whining instead of winning. They fail at taking control of their life, so their automatic response to this, is bash someone elses. Why else would someone refuse to believe that Khloe’s new killer body has come from anything other than clean eating and hard work? And what magical liposuction do they think would give her a body like that anyway? She looks incredible, shes toned, athletic, sculpted and lean, that’s not from magic beans, it’s from dedication!
‘Anyone could have a body like that with her money!’ – I hear you cry.
Wrong. Yes, it is probably a lot easier for Khloe to rock up at the gym at 6am in her Range Rover, than it is for me carting my rucksack and carrier bags on the no.43 bus. And it would be just swell if a make-up artist could do something about the red sweaty mess that is my face when I finish my cardio HIIT, but instead I have to suck it up and make the walk to work looking like a troll. Having financial advantages makes life easier, but it doesn’t do the work for you. And deep down I believe these ‘haters’ know that, and that’s the bit that crawls up their ass and bites down, the disappointment in their own flaws and character.
So, how do we tune that out? It’s simple, by recognizing why they hate. Once you accept the hating comes from an emotional void or overfill in that persons character that you can’t control, you realise how much their negative attitude isn’t really about you, it’s about them. All the anger and the hate, or sometimes just a bit of passive-aggressive negativity, is pooling somewhere in the pit of that persons stomach, and witnessing other peoples success, is just making it grow. Their attitude is about their life, it doesn’t really have any reflection on yours, or who you are as a person.
So, smile. Because ‘Haters gonna Hate’. But it doesn’t mean you have to.
* I have no idea if there is a page 1-99 Argos jewellery catalogue, this is a fictional description